Even though Christmas is over I'm still hearing Christmas music played wherever I go. I'm definitely not a fan of Christmas Music...sorry "Holiday" Music. I just find most of the music is forced upon the artists to try to come up with something just to make a buck (don't get me wrong if I could make a few million I'd sell out in a minute as well).
U2, Bon Jovi, Bruce Springsteen, John Lennon, Elvis Presley, Stevie Wonder, and Paul McCartney have all come up with Christmas Music...sorry "Holiday" Music that isn't very good at all but at least some of them are bearable. A few of the oldies like Nat King Cole and Bing Crosby are some of the songs that I enjoy.
I actually don't even mind the most overplayed song in the world, "All I Want For Christmas" by Mariah Carey. This might be due to the fact that my wife absolutely loves it. Since I'm forced to listen to it on my iPod every hour during Christmas I've trained my mind to be okay with the song.
The list of songs that I absolutely can't stand would be way too long to list out so I figured I'd just give you my #1 worst Christmas song...sorry "Holiday" song:
"Last Christmas" by Wham
This has to be the worst attempt at a Christmas song for 2 reasons:
1. This is one of the gayest songs ever. If Richard Simmons were a song instead of an actual person, this song would still be gayer than Richard Simmons. I also get an awful picture in my mind of George Michael carving these lyrics into the door of a bathroom stall.
2. This song has nothing to do with Christmas. This is the ultimate use of throwing the word "Christmas" into a song for the sole purpose of selling this song and re-releasing on different compilations each year. The only part is when it says, "Last Christmas, I gave you my heart."
How did they get away with this? Any artist could have added the word Christmas into their song for no reason...
"Welcome to the Jungle. We've got fun and games. We got everything you want. Just like on Christmas Day." Gun's and Roses
"You gotta fight, for your right, for Chrrriiiiissssttttmassss." Beastie Boys
"Go shorty, it's Christmas. We're going to party like it's Christmas." 50 Cent
Wham did basically what Sesame Street would do by throwing a word into a song to try to make it relate to a situation...
"Letter 'B'" song by Muppets dressed as Beatles instead of "Let Her Be" by The Beatles, etc.
Watch the video for this song and hopefully it creeps you out as much as it does for me.
***The great part about the video is that the actress in it is Sean Young who is actually a man as we all know..."She's not Lois Einhorn ! She's Ray Finkle . She's man . ..... Einhorn is Finkle! Finkle is Einhorn!… Einhorn is a man!!! OH MY GOD!!! EINHORN IS A MAN!" I'm sure George has had a few "guns" digging into his hips in the past.***
Feel free to Leave comments on your #1 song you hate as well.
1 comment:
I wrote about this a few years ago when I went through all of the unnecessary Christmas carols and wanted to petition to ban ridiculous lyrics no one knows or cares about (like figgy pudding-- WTF is that?) and this one is right up there.
However one of the ones I can't stand is the "Do They Know It's Christmas (Feed the World)" from the '80s. I know, I know, almost an all-star cast of musicians however the simple answer is: no, they don't know it's Christmas, because starving kids in Africa aren't Christian and would be happy with the crumbs from our half-eaten Christmas cookies. Plus plenty of people who DO know it's Christmas are homeless and in our same towns, yet there's no song about them. Bah humbug!
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